So, there's this rabbit hole.....

[mangosteen]

Son of a fucking bitch.

They say that you're never supposed to fix things that aren't broken. Problem is, people pay me to fix things, no matter what state they're in to begin with. In my line of work, things tend to stay fixed.

So let me just tell you how much it CHAFES MY FUCKING NARDS when the client doesn't tell me that the problem he wants me to fix involves some Eldritch motherfucker from the abyss. Haven't seen it yet. Wouldn't be here if I had. I don't care if you enjoy slowjacking to Event Horizon with the lights off, you ain't coming out the other side of meeting a forty-foot-tall mound of oatmeal with teeth without losing whatever tenuous hold you had on reality in the first place.

The cute little path of entrails behind the Stop And Shop was the first clue. Hopefully I'm just dealing with a cultist who let his science project get out of hand. At least there's a way to make that problem go away... I think I might use a silver platter to deliver the poor schmuck's head. It'll make me feel better.

Either that, or something did come up from the depths, and all I've got is a big fucking gun.
I'll be rich, dead, or too insane to notice the difference.

Eh. It's a living.

Comments

[arimathea.livejournal.com]

Jesus fucking christ, what a hell of a rant. Want to buy more of this.

[bookly.livejournal.com]

Best one I've seen so far. :)

[lachesis.livejournal.com]

"I don't care if you enjoy slowjacking to Event Horizon with the lights off, you ain't coming out the other side of meeting a forty-foot-tall mound of oatmeal with teeth without losing whatever tenuous hold you had on reality in the first place."

heh. and you wonder why I say I've missed you when I finally do see you.

It aint for the sentient oatmeal, that's for sure.

[xeger.livejournal.com]

It's not the sanity - it's the failure to realize that the slow rot of datastarve and the compression of meatspace have driven you from your self to some strange base set of putrid entrails, slowly oozing flakes of hair and skin.

The swift fall from quicksilver light and flashing Icarus was long and beautiful in a neon sort of way.

[glass-diva.livejournal.com]

Say, you all didn't happen to do a bunch of drugs, did ya?

[mangosteen]

You may want to click on the link.

[dsrtao]

Stephen Zielinski, _Bad Magic_. Highly recommended in your present frame of reality.

I assume you've already read Stross's _The Atrocity Archives_?

[mangosteen]

I have read neither.
Both look very interesting.
It is not my policy to buy fiction in hardcover.
I'll wedge them into the book queue at some point, and get them out of the library.
Thanks for the pointers.

Damn...

[avivasedai.livejournal.com]

I *hate* it when the entrails are still steaming. I generally try and keep some good protective charms or talismans on me; it's not my job to deal with them, so I'll just keep them away.


(nice piece; I wanted more behind the cut!)